No Pants Day is a day to wear no pants, preferably in public.

No-Pants-Day

Setting Orange 5 Chaos: The Apostle Hung Mung’s Holyday. Sage of Ancient China, and Official Discordian Missionary to the Heathens. He who originally devised the Sacred Chao, which was promptly ripped off by the Taoists. Patron to Discordians who enjoy television static.

The 73rd and Last Day of the Season of The Aftermath. Eye Day is celebrated by playing Discordian Games.

A Whollyday also known as Santa Claus Day occurring on 67 Aftermath aka 25 December.

A holyday celebrating the capitalist gift giving season.

Do the money dance, waving money in fans whilst blasting Money by Pink Floyd. Identify a ridiculously worthless toy and encourage all small children to want one. Select greyfaces to receive a particular theme gift (like banana-flavored edible underwear) from thousands.

Giftmas

The 50th Day of the Season of The Aftermath. The Fluxday marking the approach of the Season of Chaos.

Chaos (season)

The 27th Day of the Season of The Aftermath, aka The Day of the Sloth.

Boomtime 5 Aftermath: The Apostle Malaclypse the Elder’s Holyday. A wandering Wiseman of Ancient Mediterrania (“Med-Terra” or middle earth), who followed a 5-pointed Star through the alleys of Rome, Damascus, Baghdad, Jerusalem, Mecca and Cairo, bearing a sign that seemed to read “DOOM”. (This is a misunderstanding. The sign actually read “DUMB”.)

The 73rd and Last Day of the Season of Bureaucracy. Eye Day is celebrated by playing Discordian Games.

The 50th Day of the Season of Bureaucracy. The Fluxday marking the approach of the Season of The Aftermath.

Aftermath (season)

The 27th Day of the Season of Bureaucracy: The Day of the Sloth, Holy Day of Slothage. Kick back. Hang around. Grow Moss.

Sloth-day

Prickle-Prickle 5 Bureaucracy: The Apostle Zarathud’s Holyday. A hard nosed Hermit of Medieval Europe and Chaosphe Bible Banger (after his enlightenment, that is). Dubbed “Offender of The Faith”. Discovered the Five Commandments (The Pentabarf).

Zaraday

˙sǝᴉʇᴉʌᴉʇɔɐ ǝʇɐᴉɹdoɹddɐuᴉ ǝpnlɔuᴉ sǝᴉʇᴉʌᴉʇɔɐ ǝʇɐᴉɹdoɹdd∀

Expose your undies! Celebrate by wearing nothing but unmentionables in public, or at least by wearing your underwear, or somebody else’s, where people can see it so they can gawk at you. (This is a great day to apply for membership in the Lesser Disorder of Underwear Heads.)

Multiversal Underwear Day

The 73rd and Last Day of the Season of Confusion. Eye Day is celebrated by playing Discordian Games.

Confusion

The 50th Day of the Season of Confusion. The Fluxday marking the approach of the Season of Bureaucracy.

Confuflux

Speak to everyone by pronouncing the words as if they were spelled backwards. .gnihtyna egnahc dluow ti taht toN

The middle day of the year. Use only middle names, stay to the middle of the road, pat or rub your or someone else’s middle (this is a great day to apply to join The Order of the Holy Chao Belly Rubbers). Point to things with your middle finger. Visit a middle school and talk about the good old days of the Middle Ages. (If you want to get technical, on Leap Year this day would run from noon of July 2 to noon of July 3, but you don’t have to get that anal unless you really want to).

Mid Year’s Day

Recognize and credit your imaginary friend, whom you blame for everything on all the other days of the year. Or help someone anonymously, but in a way they’d never expect. (“Captain Tuttle” was the made-up buddy of Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce and “Trapper John” McIntire on the TV show M*A*S*H. They used the mythical captain’s identity to get supplies and funds from the U. S. Military which were then sent to help an orphanage).

Imaginary Friend Day